Australian Government to ship Smith, Warner to serve time on Van Diemen’s Land

Dumped Australian cricket leadership pair Steve Smith and Dave Warner may find themselves sent to Van Diemen’s Land (now known as Tasmania) for life following direct reports from Canberra.

Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull announced today the Federal Government is considering reintroducing the program which saw Australia’s worst criminals shipped to the island state in the 1800s, simply to deal with the atrocities committed by the Australian leadership pair.

“So far punishments from the ICC have not been harsh enough,” Turnbull said.

“We have murderers, people forcing small children to cook methamphetamine in houses across the country,” Turnbull spat as tears welled in his eyes.

“But this … this is an outrage. It is plain disgusting. I can’t recall ever encompassing such a horrible, horrible crime.”

The Prime Minister went on to say “a lifetime ban is simply not enough” and that the pain riffling through the community is simply irreparable, even if the pair were to go on and score countless runs at test level.

“We will take whatever action is necessary to ensure justice is taken against these disgraced leaders who have disgraced the already previously disgraced reputation of Australian cricket and ruined the lives of the entire Australian population,” Turnbull said.

A shit storm of social media posts have echoed the Prime Minister’s words — one reading: “great call PM — a little barbaric but make them serve their time in hell!”, another: “I’d prefer to KMS than be shipped to Tassie.”

The re-envisioned ‘Port Arthur’ bill is expected to enter the lower house later this week.

More to come.


Featured image (clockwise from top left): Cricket Australia | Public domain | Andrew Braithwaite

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