Friendship circles around the country are often stricken by one bloke notorious for dishing out shit calls.
Adelaide university student, Matt, 21, loves ripping out an unbelievably heinous call, his mates claim.
“He most recently claimed that TEDs [Toohey’s Extra Dry] was a good beer,” his mate, Dan said.
“He rocked up to mine with a carton — he got absolutely sniped by all the boys.”
But in very rare times, these shit-kickers of the group occasionally nail an absolute belter of a call.
The lower bar of expectation can cause rooms to explode with huge roars of laughter and surprise from all witnesses.
Just last week, after lashing out four horrible calls for the night, Matty delivered an absolute ripper.
“Don’t you reckon it’s cooked how blueberries are usually blue — purple when smashed — and white when you peel them?” Matty reportedly asked his mates while sipping on his TED.
“Fuck that’s actually not a bad call,” his mates replied.
But Dan says his mates will never give Matt leeway when it comes to making rubbish comments.
“We’ll give you that one Matto, but it doesn’t make up for your past six years of pure shit-talk,” he said addressing Matt.
“And I’m pretty sure it’s your round mate.”
Matt makes up a surprisingly large population of flogs embedded into various parts of Australian society.
Matt’s Dad, Greg, 52, admits Matt’s got a reputation for poor judgement, but recommends doing the right thing by crucifying your mates whenever they make an unjust statement.
“No one should get away with making horrible calls — but likewise, you must celebrate absolute rippers — it’s a high risk, low reward game,” Greg said.
“The development of social media and what not just allows kids to talk smack without consequence. I’m glad to hear his mates make an effort to pull his head in.”
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THE MANKAD 