For many families, this Sunday will entail a stroll up lofty — a quick selfie — before lining up to devour some Sunshine and Smoothie Bowls at ARGO on the Parade.
But today, Burnside Mum, Tash, 47, shockingly admitted to her daughter that she had no interest in donning any activewear this weekend.
“I was hoping to have a slow morning — maybe the kids could cook me brekky,” Tash said.
“I know that’s preposterous — we live in Burnside for heaven’s sake [laughing].”
Tash proceeded to hit the back of her head deliriously.
Her daughter, Tilly, 19, believes Tash has forgotten why Mother’s Day is important.
“Bless her — Mum doesn’t understand that I need to upload a photo of us together at the top of Lofty to show how cute our relationship is,” Tilly said.
“These days it’s ironic to be besties with your parents — it’s edgy and cool.”
Tash’s family has also planned to meet the grandparents for a local pub’s ‘three-course set menu’ spread.
Her husband, Peter, describes these set menus as ‘pre-planned ripoffs’ purely designed to convenience pubs.
“We’re paying $90 per head for what will probably be an oyster and scallop each, before a puny slice of duck, quail or something else that sounds fancy but realistically is kind of shit,” Peter said.
“No doubt the missus will hand me the bill as well — ever since the in-laws helped out with our wedding costs, I’ve had to shell out for every family gig.”
Peter is desperately hoping all Mother’s Day formalities are over before 4pm so he can fuck off down to the sports bar and watch the footy.
“I got on the Swans at 2.15,” Peter said.
“A few bombs from Buddy and I’ll be laughing — that’s Mother’s Day paid.”